and that's how you make a raspberry tort. Not a long long time ago in a galaxy not far far away (having never met Luke Skywalker, Darth Vader, Obi Wan Kenobi, Princess Leia, Han Solo, Chewbacca, R2D2, C3PO, George Lucas, Kirk, Picard, Janeway, those people from Babylon 5 or Eric Cartman of South Park) Two not evil simian overloads (not George Bush or Bill Clinton) vie o'er reign of a planet of the apes (but not The Planet of The Apes.) During the battle Ping, a noble adventurer (much like Harrison Ford), arrives just in time (kinda like Spiderman.) Pursued by the National Guard and sinister scientists (like Dr. Zachary Smith from Lost In Space and Dr Frankfurter from The Rocky Horror Picture Show but not like Dr. Spock who wrote about babies,) leaving in his wake a broken relationship (like Lady Di and Prince Charles of The Royal Family or Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman) and a devasted friend (who cried like Nancy Kerrigan) He races through the stratosphere in his spaceship (which is more like the Space Shuttle than The Enterprise or Battlestar Galactica) and on to face his Destiny (like Mark Hamil.) This is his story.

"Everything's  so complicated"